They didn’t have to tell me you were a boy. I knew. I mean, I could see. Right there on the ultrasound screen, before the tech could get the words out of her mouth, I exclaimed,
“It’s a boy!”
Perhaps even before seeing I already knew. A boy. It felt both unfamiliar and completely right all at the same time.
You are the adventure I never knew I needed. Even before that “it’s a boy” moment, I felt God prompting me, preparing me, telling me that YOU were exactly what I needed.
All I felt like I knew were girls. I am one for starters. My only sibling is a girl, and I’ve always had a majority of girl friends. Girl seemed familiar. Girl seemed known.
There would come a time that the familiarity of a girl would be right. But right then, it was only you, my boy.
I felt a tug—a silent voice whispering that the unknown was best. That the adventure you’d bring was just right for me. For us. You, Daddy, and me.
And, boy oh boy, did I need you. Even from the time my body was your only home, I felt it—new things starting to sprout. As I was preparing to give birth to you, you were birthing something in me. It’s hard to exactly pinpoint what it was, but I felt it—new parts of my heart opening up, new curiosities surfacing, and a new kind of love starting to form. A love for a baby, yes, but even more than that, a love for you, my son.
Now you’re here, and oh the sense of wonder you bring. Your boyish grunts and heavy-as-lead footsteps. Your love for balls and outside. Your sweaty head and ruddy cheeks. There are so many classic boy things about you. These things feel both new and oh-so-precious to me.
And beyond the things that make you a boy, there is the intricate design, the intentional weaving together of the things that make you you. These are the things that are becoming “classic Fox.” Your sensitivity, your kindness, your desire to be with us. Your curiosity and hunger to learn. Your love for books. Your focus on people. Your memory! Your sensitive heart and spirit.
I’m so glad you were chosen for me and I was chosen for you, and that being a boy mom is part of my story in spite of how unfamiliar it seemed or all the experience I felt I was lacking.
So here we are beyond reason and planning, a perfectly suited pair handpicked for each other, and it’s crystal clear that we were meant to be, my boy, you and me.
Photos by Rachel Coffey Photography | Fox at 2 years old